So, Canada. That vast mix of wilderness, industry and more water than your eyes have ever seen

Okay, so I have returned. And discovered some incredibly exciting news in my inbox - more on which at a later date, I'm sure.

So, Canada. That vast mix of wilderness, industry and more water than your eyes have ever seen (normally such expanses would undoubtedly be classed as seas, over there they are mere lakes... actually, at this point, what defines whether a lake is a lake rather than an ocean or the sea? Being Surrey-based I don't often have to battle with such terminology).

Anyway, where was I...?

Ah, yes, Canada. Over 12 days, we shifted gears from Hamilton to Quebec, via Ottawa, Montreal and then Toronto. We covered over 1,500 miles; saw at least six waterfalls (including the mighty Niagara - which rather shockingly sits next to the tackiest town I think I have ever laid my eyes upon); missed every single Mountie in the country (are they really more than a publicity stunt?); embarrassed the locals with our attempts to speak French; stayed in motels of the 'horror movies may be filmed here' variety (okay, mild exaggeration); narrowly missed out on spotting Kevin Spacey filming his latest role; watched on from a distance as the British government fell to pieces while the Canadian government appeared to be doing their best to follow suite; got attacked by bears (not really); saw the bed that John and Yoko made their protest in 40 years ago; watched a lot of ice hockey and went to a baseball game; drank vast amounts of coffee from a chain yet to reach England (set up by a former professional Ice Hockey player and a policeman I believe, no really); discovered that the Niagara area is actually on the same parallel as Bordeaux and as such produces vast amounts of wine, glanced enviously at the British weather forecasts as we looked longingly at the skies for a hint of blue; and much more but I’m probably boring you already. So, I’ll leave it there for now, follow up with some pictures shortly and apologies for bringing the murky weather back with me.

Sorry.

Right, back to normal life...